"The most powerful thing you can do is love him."

"this may sound cliche, but I'm going to say it anyway; love him."

1.  feel the hurt. mourn the loss. know that it is ok to be mad. it is ok to be upset. it is ok to hurt. Ecclesiastes 3:1 "For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven"

2.  forgive him.  Ephesians 4:32 "Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you."

3.  love him. 1 Peter 4:8 "Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins."


It makes sense right?  Experience the hurt. Move into forgiveness. Move into actively loving.  On paper it makes sense. It is the formula scripture gives us for reconciliation.  Christ tells us to forgive those who have hurt us, because we are forgiven; we have experienced His grace so we should spread it to others!  We should love our enemies and pray for them; PRAY FOR OUR ENEMIES.  Through experiencing hurt, forgiveness, and love, healing takes place.  These are the commands given to us in scripture.  This is what we are told to do when we come up to opposition and hurtful times.

Easier said then done, eh?  Easier to say, "pray for your enemies," than actually praying for the person who rear ended your car yesterday.  Easier to say, "forgive those who hurt you," than actually forgiving someone who has wounded you.  Right now I am amidst a broken relationship (aren't we all?).  I have been deeply hurt and wounded by someone close to me and have been for years.  Recently it has come to a boiling point and something has to be done about it.  I know I have to take action instead of wallowing, but I don't want to.  I don't want to forgive.  My heart doesn't yearn to love him.  I have so much inter turmoil right now, because I know what I should do.  I know what the gospel tells me to do and the steps to take, yet my heart isn't there. Right now, I am finding that I don't want to be transformed by the gospel in this situation.  I find myself wanting to stay angry and distant.  I know forgiving and loving him will be one of the hardest things I do and I don't think I'm ready for that.


Lord, I long to want to be transformed by the gospel.


I had a conversation about this mess with someone from my missional community with Coram Deo and I closed our talk with, "I don't want my heart to become hard.  I don't want that to be me."
He replied, "We won't let that happen.  You are going to have to walk away from us before we let that happen."


Praise God for community and accountability.  I am incredibly thankful for those who have surrounded me with love and prayers.  I am thankful for those who have chosen to walk along side me in this season of hurt in my life.  I am thankful for those who refuse to let me stay where I currently am, for those who long to see me transformed by the gospel, and for those who will challenge me to change.